Fluorescerama: Equinox (1970)

In the tradition of the Peter Fonda cult classic Race With The Devil, Equinox is a supernatural thriller that satisfies on every level. The ludicrous plot seems stitched together at random by someone suffering from short term memory loss, and the characters' motivations are illogical at best. The acting is hollow, and... it was a real laugh riot! Although I might have found this movie amusing for all the wrong reasons, watching Equinox is a recommended treat!

[WARNING! This post contains a full plot synopsis that will spoil the movie for you!]

'I'm hep, daddy-o. I'm into the Ramones!'

The Ramones might not have cared about history (it just wasn't where they wanted to be), but they made it in August 1979 when they exploded on to the big screen with the cult favorite, Rock 'N' Roll High School [2]. The Queens, New York-based band shared screen time with PJ Soles (Carrie, The Boy in the Plastic Bubble), Vince Van Patten, and Clint Howard in this apocalyptic teen comedy.

The premise is an easy A: PJ Soles is Riff Randell, typical Ramones-obsessed teen who ditches school to secure a ticket for the Ramones concert. But when her tickets are confiscated by Vince Lombardi High's newest and nastiest principal, Miss Togar, she has to find a replacement. Proving once and for all that teachers and parents just don't get it, an auditorium of concerned authority figures rile up the student body with a massive record burning that must have been more painful to endure than a teenage lobotomy. But, don't worry, the PTA gets it in the end! What results is a fun-fun (oh ba-by!) teen comedy for the ages that should send everyone Gabba Gabba Hey-ing all the way to the cineplex. It's a blast, literally!

Joey, Johnny, Dee Dee, and Tommy pack their soundtrack with some of their best and most memorable songs, though there are quite a few non-Ramone contributions (Fleetwood Mac?!). The best movie scenes are the ones that actually feature the red-hot rockers. In a sequence that is surely every teen girl's fantasy (?), Joey serenades a barely-dressed Riff with 'I Want You Arou-ound.' Later, the quartet bursts on the scene with their lamentation, 'I Just Wanna Have Something To Do' (Might I suggest having some chicken vindaloo?).

Rock 'N' Roll High School Forever was the 1991 bomb of a sequel starring Corey Feldman and a handful of lesser California punk icons. I mean, who would choose Mojo Nixon over Joey Ramone??

Whatever Happened To Pudding Pops?

Pop Culture Encyclopedias

X-TINCTION RATING: Revised and revived.

Revised and revived by Gael Fashingbauer Cooper and Brian Bellmont's new book Whatever Happened to Pudding Pops?: The Lost Toys, Tastes & Trends of the '70s & '80s (Perigee Books, 2011).

My bookcase dips in the middle under the weight of my pop culture library. From the massive, all-inclusive ABBA To Zoom to the pocket-sized Guilty Pleasures and bridging the gap between the anecdotal, countercultural RetroHell [1970s-1980s] from the writers of the Ben Is Dead zine to the pseudo-intellectual snooze that is alt.culture [1990s], you would think that another paean to pop cultural memories would be as necessary as a new Planet of the Apes movie.

Sit, Hubu, Sit! Good dog.

Why is Paul in the family picture? If Paul's in the family picture, why not Winnie Cooper?

I can't believe it happened so quickly: this past week was my one year cable anniversary. Overall, I've been pleased with the selection of programming. I discovered that there is one half-decent TCM movie for every bum station filled with infomercials and mindless reality tv (In fact, I've watched 198 of them in the past year!). However, I've been lamenting the fact that I apparently missed out on the golden age of Nick At Nite and TV Land. I'm not sure how their definition of classic television has warped into George Lopez and Nanny reruns, and, while I used to watch Roseanne and a few other 1980s-90s sitcoms that air currently on (for some reason) multiple channels, they're not something that I'd want to watch for several hours every single day.

But deciding what to watch on television (my major daily dilemma) has just gotten a whole lot better and more confusing. The Hub is an all-new 'network for kids and their families' that debuted on October 10th. This cable channel has a prime-time dream lineup for fans of classic 1970s and 80s pop culture.

Bask in the Hub's weeknight (Monday through Thursday) prime-time schedule (EST):

Family Ties 8-9 PM - Mallory dressed like Little House on the Prairie for the first season! [see also the Mallory's Clothes Tumblr]
The Wonder Years (my favorite show of all-time) 9-9:30 PM - With the original soundtrack. I don't believe this will ever be on DVD in its original format, so set your recording devices to catch every bittersweet moment.
Doogie Howser, MD 9:30-10 PM - Boy genius doctor and first ever blogger!
Happy Days 10-11 PM - Got a couch? Then sit on it, Potsie, while you're watching the Fonz! Ayyy?
Laverne & Shirley 11-11:30 PM - Best enjoyed with a Pepsi-Cola and milk!
Batman 11:30 PM - 12 AM - Biff! Zok! Adam West!

During the afternoons, Hub airs the Jim Henson classic, Fraggle Rock, and late at night they have the original 1980s animated Transformers and GI Joe series. There are also new versions of Strawberry Shortcake, My Little Pony, and the Pound Puppies (these are not the original animated versions that we enjoyed in the 1980s, though they still may be of interest). That's all I've noticed so far, but there might be even more exciting schedule additions! I haven't peeked ahead at the weekend schedule, but it looks like there's something called Family Game Night on Friday nights that is like Double Dare meets gigantic Hasbro games. Apparently the channel is owned by Hasbro, which explains the Hasbro game and Playskool advertisements.

Round out any schedule holes with the other great pop culture channel, Boomerang from Cartoon Network, and you'll never have to remember the last decade again. Boomerang has everything from The Banana Splits, Pink Panther, Scooby Doo (and other meddling kids in the guise of Jabberjaw and Speed Buggy), Top Cat, The Flintstones, The Jetsons, and Josie And The Pussycats to The Smurfs and The Snorks (to name but a few -- check the schedule for new editions).